This isn’t what I wanted to post about today.
Penciled neatly into my brand new planner was a recap of the month of June according to #’s. It was supposed to be easy to write, something I could schedule way in advance and a light-hearted post for a Monday morning. However, my heart has felt everything but light lately. What I planned to post and what I feel I should post are two very different things. In the end my heart won out and now I’m sitting here unsure of where I should start.
Over the past week I was slammed with a phrase, by someone very close to me, that I can’t stop thinking about. Their words were spoken out of anger when my actions didn’t meet their approval. I have been thinking about any truth that could be found in their statement but more than that the lies that live in the head of someone who would say these words.
“And you’re supposed to be a Christian”
Phrase it 10 different ways if you’d like, the variations are countless. This phrase is likely one that anyone following after Christ for any amount of time has been attacked with in one way or another. The thing is this. I can’t help but think a person who accuses someone with these words is void of any understanding about what being a Christian truly means.
Being a Christian does not mean that you are free of temptation or sin. It doesn’t mean that you make the right choice every time. It doesn’t give you a strong marriage, all the money you need, well-behaved children, and an annoyingly effortless love for people. Being a Christian doesn’t give you super powers.
The problem with this accusation is that it comes with the impression that being a Christian makes you perfect, which simply put is a lie. The truth is there was only one person who ever lived a perfect, sinless life and he gave himself as a sacrifice to pay for our sins, my sins, the sins I continually struggle with every moment of every day.
And that is what is tearing me apart. That people buy into lies that Christians actually believe they are perfect. That someone expects me to live a perfect life and if I stumble I have not only given them a reason to mock me , but an excuse to continue living a life void of a relationship with God.
Where do I go from here? First I’d like to say that I’m not angry and forgive the person for the words they spoke. I love them very much and will continue to pray for them daily. Secondly I’d like to repent. If this false image of Christian perfection is one that I have portrayed through my words and actions, I am sorry. I want to live a life that is pleasing to God and continuously points others to him, through good times and bad.
For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.” Romans 1:17 ESV